Everyone is different, but many women say that ectopic pregnancy is a very upsetting and frightening experience, even if they weren’t planning to have a baby.
There is no right or wrong way to feel and you may find that you have lots of ups and downs in the days, weeks and months after your loss. Some common feelings are:
- about the diagnosis, or even finding out you were pregnant (these may happen at the same time)
- about what happened, especially in an emergency
- about what might have happened.
Everything happened so quickly. I never had time to think about it until after my operation. Once I was discharged from hospital I was left feeling very alone with so many ‘what ifs’ running through my head.
- Loss and grief
Everyone tells me how lucky I am to be alive. But I’ve lost my baby and I just feel so empty.
- Feeling ‘in limbo’
- if you are having repeated blood tests and follow-up
- if you have to wait some months before you can try again
- Anxiety about the future
- about whether you can get pregnant again
- about the chance of having another ectopic pregnancy
- about whether you should try again or whether you want to.
The experience of ectopic pregnancy can be extremely distressing. You may feel very relieved to be alive and free from pain, yet still feel deeply sad at the loss of your baby and anxious about the future. Your partner may have similar feelings, or might be more concerned about your health, especially if you were treated as an emergency.
Whatever your and your partner’s feelings, you don’t have to bear them alone. Please see details here of where you can find support from others who will understand.